Thursday, September 12, 2013

You may say I’m a dreamer . . . and you would be write

Like I said in my previous blog, thinking outside the box is highly overrated. When I was part of the corporate world—okay, that’s a real stretch—bosses would always harp on the need to think outside the box. And when an underling would actually propose a novel creative approach, the boss would invariably give the guy a look that said, “where did we get this schmuck?”

Thankfully, I no longer have a boss giving me those looks. Now when I propose one of my outside the box strategies I get a laugh and shake of the head from my wife accompanied by a look that says, “God, I love him . . . even if he is a bit strange and still acts like an overgrown child.” Or that’s what I imagine anyway.

This morning I was doing a little research on book promotion and realized I had forgot one of the basic rules: Beg, plead and cry—no, wait a minute, that’s how I got my wife to marry me. I don’t think that will work in selling books, except for close friends and family. Sorry, another one of my digressions that faithful readers of this blog are all too familiar with.

Again, back to the basics.

First rule of promotion is the press release. Gotta let the world know that you have arrived on the stage. A well-written press release can get your book out there on a slow news day. One author’s blog recommended Free Press Release as a site to build your press release. And for free! But then again, nothing is really free, is it? No, the site wants you to spend $19/PR for a Premier Account; $59/PR for a Customized Account; and $399/PR for an advanced account. What does that /PR mean? Press Release? Per Release? Pretty Ridiculous?  Wait—

I’ve just had an epiphany.

I am a real schmuck!

Here I am, contemplating spending more money promoting a book—albeit a good book in my biased opinion—for a chance at winning the book lottery. For every PJ Rolling or whatever the hell her name is, there are millions of Art Dumphies (I couldn’t bear to use my own name, so I substituted Art). If there is a real Art Dumphie out there, please, accept my apology. And Art, if you’re out there and have an eBook for sale, I’ll buy it. As long as it is not more than $2.99. Because, I’m a real Schmuck.

Should have gotten my MBA and started a company that takes advantage of hopeless dreamers like myself, and the millions of other aspiring authors out there. Nahhhhhhhhhhh. I’ll stick to writing and dreaming—but I’m not the only one.

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